The Other Side of the Camera

Growing up. It doesn't seem so impending until you look back to where you have come from. Suddenly it feels as though I have no time left to do what I want before I'm out of the house and I have a family of my own. Where did the time go anyway? I haven't wasted away my childhood years yet, or have I?

For awhile, and still occasionally, I was excited for the day when I would get my independence. I would count the years until I would be eligible for marriage. Now, as the number gets smaller and smaller, it's almost terrifying; I miss my days of innocence.

Just recently, we dug out our old, dusty video tapes of Ben and my childhood. The first tape we watched, we were four and two. They bring back so many good memories. Watching them makes me giggle at how silly we used to be and yet we were extremely matured for our ages. Mom and I start comparing us to other kids that age, "[Mary] still can't talk as well as Ben does here and she's much older!"

"Can you imagine [Sally] playing the violin at her age?"

I look back in amazement at our abilities. At five years old, I was the youngest in a kid's choir with kids up to Junior High and I had every word of the songs memorized and I knew what I was singing about!

Yet, even though I could do all those things, I was an absolute brat! All of the camera attention, though it usually wasn't (thank goodness!), had to be focused on me...even though Ben was tons cuter. (I wish I could digitalize some of his so I could show you how adorable he was.) I used to do some of the dumbest things and tell Mom to watch; I was rarely candid. Ben, on the other hand, was always wonderful even when he was trying to show off for the camera.

It's these videos that make me realize how much I have grown up so quickly. Before I know it, I'll become the voice on the other side of the camera. There's no way that I will let the childhood of my (hopefully) future children slip by without me capturing at least some of it in a camera lens. Especially since I am having so much fun looking back on my young life now. And I'm only sixteen!